Remember Gavin de Becker’s 1997 book, “The Gift of Fear?” A potential employer gave it to me during one of their intensive interviews. Strange gift for most jobs, but this one fit the bill. I was interviewing for work as a private investigator.

Surprisingly, I got the job.

My one year stint as a PI was more than I bargained for. But one thing I learned from the book and the job was to follow my instincts.

Or so I thought.

Like Jesaka I’ve had to relearn the lesson time and time again.

As a P.I., not trusting my inner teacher (as I like to call it) was dangerous. And as a writer, it was bad business.

Here’s what I lost in the process:

Read the rest of this entry

Photo by: roberthuffstutter

My husband and I hobbled on over to a used car lot recently. The reason for our less than enthusiastic attitude was our fear of encountering the dreaded stereotypical used car salesman. The man with a big persona (a.k.a. desperate man who talks too much).

You know the guy. The one who hunts you down and seems to pick up your scent even before he sees you. A swarm of salesman suddenly encircles you all in business suits, all waiting until fatigue and desperation gives way to a sale.

Okay it might not be THAT bad! But if used car salesman can smell fresh new meat a mile away, then I can tell desperation from afar as well. When a guy comes running towards me asking to show me his car without even knowing what I’m looking for, I run the other way. Desperation is not attractive when dating or when selling. Read the rest of this entry

Photo by striatic

Have you ever had a bad haircut? I’m sure we’ve all had them. As for me, I’m like TLC’s Duggarts, I’m on my fifth and counting.

The thing my husband always says after I get back from another disappointing hairdo is, “I don’t get it. You tell them exactly what you want and they never do it the way you want.”

“Hmm,” I thought. There’s a bit of wisdom in there somewhere.

The more I pondered, the more I saw that there was a similarity between bad haircuts and bad business.
Read the rest of this entry