Freelance writer Laura Spencer wrote another brilliant post on Freelance Folder entitled 30 Spooky Freelancing Practices. Her list included everything from bad mouthing clients to internet surfing instead of working.
Anyone guilty of that?
I’ll admit to the latter in the past. Oops.
But while I have looked fear in its face (sometimes in the eyes of a scary scary client), none of the 30 items (though good) can match the scariest of them all.
It’s this: The fear that I’m not good enough that I’ll never make it as a professional writer.
If you have never felt this before, maybe you’re lucky. But I think most of us, even the most brilliant, accomplished writers, feel this way at one point or another.
It’s the honest to goodness spookiest thing about freelancing. But it’s something that builds character, strength and self-confidence. Because every time you choose to put yourself back out there, saddle up on that rough ride once again, you’re facing that sick, in your pit feeling of rejection. Staring deeply in his eyes and responding like Joy Behar or her impersonator on SNL, Fred Armisen, “So what?! Who cares?!”
Because eventually you’ll get published, a query will be accepted and your self-esteem will rise again.
And in the meantime, don’t give up and let the scary, spooky world out there get you down. It takes time. Maybe an eternity. But the process of being a writer will change you for the better. You’ll see.
Now go on and get out there and HAVE A HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!
This is so true! I had some really tough days this week where I went through the same thing you mention. And even though I was fully aware that I’ve been through similar ups and downs before, and that this was just one of the “downs,” it didn’t make it any easier. I like to measure it like any relationship: there will always be good times and bad times but as long as the good outweigh the bad it’s worth sticking around.
Natalia M. Sylvester recently posted..Confessions of an Online Idol Worshipper
Hi Natalia! I’m sorry you went through such a hard week. I’m right there with you. Every moment I go through an ugh or an aw yes! And I think I’m realizing that the hardest part is separating my writing from my self. That regardless of how well I do professionally, it does not change who I am. It’s one of those difficult lessons that being a writer has brought me and in the end I’m always grateful for it. I’m also grateful for writers like you. It’s nice to be able to share not just the good times, but the hard times too. Hope you have an awesome weekend Natalia!
Great post! I’m honored that you were inspired by my Freelance Folder post.
What you say here is so true. I especially remember feeling this way when I started out as a writer.
One thing that helped me was hearing a more experienced writer speak. She said (and I’m paraphrasing because I can’t remember verbatim) don’t hesitate to call yourself a professional writer. You’re being paid to write so writing is your profession. That’s the definition of what a professional writer is.
Of course, she probably said it a lot more eloquently. She was right though. Sometimes our doubts CAN be our worst obstacle.
Keep up the good work here! 🙂
Thanks so much for stopping by here Laura! It’s nice to know we’re not alone in this. And I love what you said about being a professional writer. I think it validates a lot of writers who are struggling and question if what they are doing is making a difference. Thanks so much for the comment and again for your awesome post!