Brené Brown is an expert on everything related to vulnerability. I’ve taken two of her online courses and listened to her SoundsTrue podcast recently. I’m admittedly a big huge fan.
Perhaps, it’s because I’m all too familiar with shame. It sits on my shoulder every time I publish a post, conduct a workshop/meetup or submit my writing. Until I listened to Brown, I hadn’t realized how my cheeks would burn or how embarrassed I was to let my insides show.
Rejection to me doesn’t feel uncomfortable. It feels like a slow death. It’s an end of who I am. It’s a room full of strangers laughing and pointing. It’s a deep inner ache that somehow whatever I’m doing is not enough.
Enter in my dreams and the whole thought of pursuing them seems laughable. Much better to hide behind a boring job. It’s much easier to stay with the same friendships. Way safer to keep the dreams at night and distract myself during the day with mindless activities right?
Anyone who has ever taken a big risk in being vulnerable realizes both the cost and benefit of putting yourself out on the line. You can’t truly live unless you do something that scares you sh$tless. You won’t ever feel like you’ve made your mark unless you do something that makes you feel like an idiot.. Until you risk big, you won’t feel alive.
You may will fail if you choose to live your life. But failing is a good thing. Every rejection letter you receive. Every job opportunity that doesn’t work out. Every editor that tears apart your work. Those are evidence that you are strong, and living your purpose. And there’s definitely no shame, but so much courage in that.
Failing isn’t an end state. It’s one stop on a long journey towards success.
So next time you feel defeated, remember that. Remember that failure is in its own way success. It’s a reminder that you’re fighting the fight. One more failure down, many more to go.
That’s the way we get through our writing dreams. A little bit of blind faith, hard work, and courage to be vulnerable.
